I know its been a long time since I've written a journal. This journal is actually a request to all of my friends here on deviantArt for some prayers and support for me and my family during this hard time. My Uncle passed away last night and emotionally, I'm in complete utter denial about his passing. He was more like a father than an uncle to me in many aspects. I learned a lot from him and cherish a lot of memories of him from my childhood up to his passing. It won't be easy for me to cope with the loss of somebody who I was very close to. Even those little memories of me and him hanging out together playing all the Ratchet & Clank games. Needless to say, it will be a while before I'll be wanting to play Ratchet & Clank again. And of course all the big memories I have of him like the first time I was ever allowed to sit in the front seat of a car the time I went to spend a weekend with him and my grandparents in the city or when he, my mother, went to a Christian camp for a week when my Uncle volunteered to be the head cook. He was a good man who tried his best to really make things right for him, for everyone during his life. The past 10 years of his life before his passing brought about immense change for him as he became a Christian and was Baptized. Eventually, he became a very respected preacher at our church and he was loved by all of his Christian friends and even non-Christian friends.

As for me, I'm still having a hard time believing he's really gone from us all. I will always miss that big smile that he had on his face. He lived his life with such joy and happiness and that joy and happiness transpired onto me, and that is what has really been driving me forward in my life these past few years. You'd people be surprised about the kind of person I used to be before I started living with him, my grandparents, my mom, and me all in the same household. I used to be a very quiet person, perhaps somewhat anti-social, but it was my dear Uncle that really brought a change into my life and helped me one of the best people anyone could get to know. Its hard to explain how or why, but the fact that he is now gone will forever change not only how I feel about myself but how I precieve the world around me. I won't ask anything out of anybody other than love and support now.

I'll stop here since I'm just emotionally confused. For now, I'll just have to take things one day at a time.

Maybe I'll write more after things have settled down here in the family. Until then, much love and peace to you all!